The perfect lie

Denial is a part of every human's life........

it's something that you can't control  because sometimes denial  is how we avoid the painful truth
no one wants to get hurt
no one likes the truth
pain isn't something anyone is looking for but it happens to you no matter what you do
pain happens for many things but it's mostly when you care about someone
it's like the universe  knows that someone is really special for you and the universe doesn't like that at all
so the universe turns on you because you're happy and it doesn't like it
and just like that you life turns into a mess
so there comes the pain along with depression and suffering
but its not something you can actually control when you're sad you're gonna stay sad until you figure things out with yourself
no one can control their sadness but they do control how they deal with it
denial works pretty well with people
people realize how the truth hurts so they deny it's existence in the hopes of this being just bad dream
till now people still have hope in a better tomorrow that somehow you're not going to lose someone you love or anything that would make them happy
as i said no one likes pain but it's here any ways.

Denial is a blessing 

Denial is a perfect lie 

Mirror

Do you ever stare at the mirror for a long time?
Actually it scares the hell out of me because it could be the scariest thing ever
I don't like the idea of staring at my self for a long time because i don't want to stare at everything that i hate in my self because i already hate my self as it is
The scary thing about mirrors is that its a reflection of everything you hate about yourself and by everything i do mean everything
You start seeing what you really are, what you hate about your face, your body and even whats inside of you
But imagine being a mirror, how do you think that would be?
If staring at a mirror for a while makes you see what you hate about yourself
Then being a mirror makes you see what people hate about themselves
Is that a good thing?
To see every single thing that people hate about themselves and how truly screwed up they are
Will you hate them?
Or just be happy that you're not the most screwed up person in the world?

It's far away

The story so far

Hasn't begun from the start

And it's end is so far, so far away from the start

A story where you and me live happily forever indeed

So far from our past, so far into our dreams

So far as you wish it should be

Where no pain and sorrow no we won't feel

So far away to a place where your voice is all what I can hear

So far away my dear

So far away where nothing could disturb our dreams

It's a beautiful place

Where you and me live happily forever indeed

Wise ass.....

People do stupid things, They don't have to spend the rest of their lives regretting it
We are human beings.........
Its in our blood to make stupid things
It's what makes us humans, choosing between various options crafting our own future
probably predicting it based on our actions
I myself wouldn't call them stupid, I'd call them emotional actions
Because you always follow your heart and not your brain
In the purpose of satisfying yourself  or even someone else
Which is not rational because you should make your needs at first satisfying your  needs and making your dreams come true
On the other side most of the people just care more about other people then their very own self
In the hopes that this other person might grant them happiness by the simplest expressions they make on their faces
They  have that much of trust in other people that they might do the same to them
It's emotional, you don't always think about the worst that could happen
For example, you'll always get the girl you love flowers and chocolate every day if you could and you work so hard on making her happy ignoring that fact that it might never last forever as you were imagining
 You just get your hopes and expectations so high thinking that this person might never disappoint you in any possible way
But from experience, it always happens, by time we learn that the closest people are always the ones who get your heart broken in pieces and in result you're the one who's cursing god for the day you were born crying yourself to death etc...
And here i wonder and ask myself this question
"are humans that stupid?"
We make the same mistake over and over again knowing that the possibility  of getting screwed up again does exist and we don't always learn from our mistakes
We just wonder in this huge world searching for what we call "The one"
the shining light in your darkest days, the one whos gonna alway be there when you call for help, your best friend, your soul mate and your love
Is that something worth breaking your heart for?
Over and over until you find the perfect match to your puzzle?
Some people are worth melting for and without pain we wouldn't know the meaning of joy
But as i said stupid things is what makes us humans
In both ways you'll get your heart broken and you'll break hearts
You're gonna make enemies and make new friends
You're going to love and hate
You're going to laugh out loud and cry yourself to sleep
This is how its been and how its always gonna be
Because we are humans
And we are just as fucked up as we could ever be

My Days with her. (3)

Day one hundred and eighty two......


of course there were ups and downs 
i got depressed so many times 
but what always kept me going was that spark 
i mean i was that lucky to get close to her,
why wouldn't i be a little more luckier and somehow we might end up together 
i knew that i was day dreaming again 
but i was happy 
then i made a promise that i couldn't keep
i thought that luck was on my side 
i did every thing that i could possibly do 
but ehh simply it wasn't enough 
i felt weak and miserable
that i could never make happy or that she hates me now 
it was a rough day for me
i just wanted to make her happy thats all 
that would've made me happy
but i guess god doesn't want me near happy........
for now i hope  
and that was day one hundred and eighty two...
  

One more kiss.....

Just one more kiss before i say goodbye ?

It's the last thing I'd do before i say goodbye 

So hold me tight in your arms, as the tears fall straight from my eyes  

Is it over yet? Are you just passing by?

How i feel when my eye meets your eye 

Wishing that someday you would be mine

But you were never mine

It's the truth that i keep inside a lie 

You found a heart and I lost mine

Maybe it's the truth i want to deny ?

Or is it just the perfect lie

Do i have to remember who am I ?

A lonely soul, begging for mercy asking God why?

Do i have to live this life with this aching heart of mine 

Will i ever die ?

Or is it just an endless torture to this broken soul of mine

I'll just sleep and dream of a better day, it's a truth that i can't deny 

I just want the sun to rise and your face to shine 

On this misery of mine 

My Days with her. (2)

day twenty one...

its been a while now and i think that we are heading for something good here
we understand each other, we liked talking to each other and the laughs and the talks and bla bla bla 
life was good 
i knew i never loved someone that much in my life...
it was great to feel "love"
i spent every moment wish that i could just hold her tight in my arms, so close to my heart that i can never miss a single heart beat without her
but i was always wondering inside of me 
always knew that something was wrong 
something wrong is going to happen cause honestly life wasn't that fair with me 
but as long as i was happy i didn't bother my self about it 
i just kept day dreaming 
when something great happened 
i was amazed how she handled, she was so calm and she was laughing like she had nothing to lose in this world 
but she owned every thing i had   
i loved the sound of her voice that night 
it was like a heavy burden was off her chest 
she was happy 
and so was i 
the spark got brighter as my hope that somehow we might be together got stronger 
that was day twenty one...